A BOLD FRESH PIECE OF INANITY »

Monday, August 31, 2009

Naps Knack

This child, it seems, has no trouble falling asleep on his own, contrasting him markedly from his older sister.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Picnic at Night

We packed the cooler and headed out for the nearby elementary school, where we planned to lay out a blanket, enjoy dinner al fresco, and hit up the playground and kick the soccer ball some before heading home for bedtime. We got through the first two stages – the dinner, by the way, was zestful: muffaletta (don’t say that five times fast), Greco-Italian noodle salad, and local organic watermelon – but the onset of evening cold forced us to abandon the activities component of our agenda.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Complementary Angels

The picture above reminds me, for reasons unbeknownst to me because the context is all wrong, of a line from the incomparable Kenny (played by Seth Green) in Can’t Hardly Wait.

"I must've died and gone to heaven 'cause there's an angel in front of me."

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Going Faux Broke

Adrian and Olivia come up with some fairly elaborative play scenarios: one involves their assuming the roles of Kit Kittredge and Ruthie Smithens, two Great Depression-era American Doll girls; another concerns their (mis)adventures as Girl Scouts; and they’ve also performed numerous gigs as traveling musicians.

This fake-the-break episode just might take the cake, though.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Nighttime Read/Reed

Reed's bedtime ritual involves the entire family: I am the point person at bath time, Olivia reads him his favorite book, and Beni nurses him to sleep. (Max even gets in the act – we often catch him passed out on Reed's blankets in the living room, presumably to warm them up for the little guy.)

Story Time from chris k on Vimeo.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

The Dentist is on Speed Dial

More toothsome than all the candy in a candy store: my sweetie and our sweet pea are very sweet on the sweet corn.

Much Sought-After Laughter

Olivia is facing larceny charges for the number of times she tries to steal the scene from her brother.

Beset the Scene from chris k on Vimeo.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

God Gab

Sophia (middle) with Ava and Olivia

Sometimes we are privy to the gems of conversations held by five-year-olds. This morning happened to be one of those times.

Sophia: "God is everywhere, but church is God’s house. When all the people die, there’s going to be a party."

Olivia: "Yeah, that’s called a funeral."

Sophia: "When you die, you go up to heaven to be with God."

Olivia: "No, when you die, you go to the cemetery where there are flowers and your name is there. Some people call it heaven, but it’s really a cemetery."

Thursday, August 20, 2009

All That and Then Samosa

Proof that I’m living the dream: I arrive home from work to my family preparing delicious homemade samosas for dinner. The whole thing almost made me cry (although that could have been from the red chili powder).

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Bases Loaded

On base:

A portion of Section 6.09 of the Official Baseball Rules states that

The batter becomes a runner when—

(b) The third strike called by the umpire is not caught, providing (1) first base is unoccupied, or (2) first base is occupied with two out;

Rule 6.09(b) Comment: A batter who does not realize his situation on a third strike not caught, and who is not in the process of running to first base, shall be declared out once he leaves the dirt circle surrounding home plate.

This means that the batter may swing and miss at three pitches – striking out – yet remain in the game as the result of an anomalous situation after the third strike. More on this later.

Off base:

“With a Puerto Rican mom and a Japanese dad, of course she’d be a shoo-in.”

Baseless:

In what’s been a rite of spring for us and many parents in our community, we had again put in an application this year for Olivia for the lab school. While she’d not been selected for their preschool program for the past two years, we were keeping our fingers crossed that she might land one of their few open slots for kindergarten. Much to our chagrin, we received the all-too-familiar consolatory letter in April, the one that attempts to assuage our pain by explaining the realities of high demand/low supply. The rational mind is able to accept this at face value, but the curious (irrational?) one prods further: Why was my child not selected? Why were others picked over her?

The conventional wisdom is that the child’s race is the overwhelming factor for admission. If I had a nickel for every time I heard a parent say that his or her child had no chance because they were white, or that our children were ideal candidates because of their racial panoply, I’d be a rich man (rich enough to buy whatever it is I need to buy to counter this overly reductive explanation of the admission process). While it is true that race plays a factor – as it often does with schools seeking diverse student populations – it’s just one of eight factors – the others being class size, district of residence, program availability, sibling ties, gender of child, academic ability, and socioeconomic levels – that is weighed by school administrators when they make their decisions.

The school is mandated to reflect the racial makeup of the community at large: in that our county is predominately white, the school is still majority white (nearly 70% by last report). Most important to this discussion, prospective students are competing for spots with only those who are of the same racial background; in other words, white kids are not being squeezed to make room for non-white kids. I think the perception of it being so diverse is due to, no doubt, the optical illusion created from seeing a rainbow of faces in each and every classroom.

First base/first days:

Last Wednesday, we got a call from the principal of the lab school offering Olivia a last-minute spot in their kindergarten. We gladly and elatedly accepted. And so we stand here now, on first base and engaged in the game, even though we’ve technically struck out, having swung and missed on the first three pitches. To think that we almost didn’t apply this year – this has all been a proper lesson on perseverance. Here are some pictures from her first days:

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Reno 91-Done!

From Twitter-land, some unfortunate news:

“Reno 911! was canceled at 1:30 pm today. Won't be wearing the shorts again.”

– the show's co-creator/star Thomas Lennon, aka Lieutenant Jim Dangle

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Mood Swings

At 11:36 a.m.:


Two minutes later:

Snakes on a Brain

To paraphrase Samuel L. Jackson’s character in a movie of similar title, Olivia was all “I've had it with these mother-of-god snakes on this mother-of-god foray” while we ambled through the forests of a county park. Now mind you that we didn’t see any slithering creatures during our hike, but the prospect of spotting one was enough to trip her reptilian brain’s instinct to flee, which we did immediately after I snapped this pic to commemorate our trek – after bribing her with a lollipop and convincing her that snakes wouldn’t be traveling on the footbridge on which she was standing, of course.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Farm Allows Function

(Photos by Becky Dorethy)
The fabulous farm owned by the friends of Beni’s co-worker served as the site of their office get-together. The living quarters was straight out of Better Homes (Farms?) and Gardens, and their property included a covered bridge, attached guest cabin, and reservoir, which we got to by hayride – a predictable means of transport, considering where we were – and around by Jet Ski – a not so predictable kind. (Many thanks to our hosts for their hospitality and to Becky for her keen photographer’s eye.)

Saturday, August 08, 2009

Child's Play

I was warned in advance that the multi-level Children’s Museum of Indianapolis is so expansive that a one-day visit couldn’t do it justice. I’m sure that’s the case for most people, but most people aren’t satisfied with an hour’s tour of the Louvre or a 45-minute jaunt through the Prado. (For the record, I was up against the clock in both instances; it’s the time or two that my adult ADD was put to good use.) Well, Olivia and I took on the challenge of tackling the entire museum in the course of one visit. Now we may have given the dollhouse and the glass sculpture and some other exhibits short shrift, but all in all, I think we took a thorough and evenly paced approach to everything else.

To proof:
  • Dinosaur dig


  • Dinosaur – big! (Olivia's touching a T Rex's actual leg bone, which tips the scales at 300 lbs.)


  • "Flight" to Egypt (her favorite activity – we rode twice)


  • Work the casbah



  • Giant kaleidoscope

Thursday, August 06, 2009

30 Rocks

Some words for my younger brother on his birthday of note: trust me on this, you’re just starting to hit your stride in your thirties. Once you get past the jokes of your imminent decline, you remind your detractors that you’re just getting started – you’re still a newlywed, you’re one year closer to finishing up your surgical residency, and most excitingly, you’re about to become a first-time dad in December.

Erick, here’s to a felicitous birthday and an unforgettable year. Many cheers to you, Danielle, and that nephew of mine growing in her belly.

Monday, August 03, 2009

The Tree and the Fallen Apple

Like mother,...


...like daughter.